查看完整版本: 3月2号考，第一篇，求大虾修改

3月2号考，第一篇，求大虾修改

students should be graded solely based on exam. /  based on both the pariticipation and exam. your opinion..

How students are graded is an important problem which is usually cared by the students. Some professors prefer to give scores solely based on exams, by giving the reason that the exams are the best method to check whether students gain the knowledge. Some other professors, however, grade the students according to both the exam and the participation in classes. As far as I am concerned, I agree that professors should take participation into consideration, when giving scores.

First and foremost, it is fair for the student. As we all know, some students are very good at having test, while others are not. It is, therefore, unfair, if the score is solely based on the exam. Taking one of mine friend Jackie as an example, she is very good at finding out the important points which may be tested in the exam. Therefore, though she seldom attends the classes, she can still get a really higher score than her classmates who never missed any classes. So grading students only based on the exam, will discourage people to attend class and it is not fair for the students who participate a lot in class.

Secondly, learning is a process, while score is just a result. From my point of view, the process is more important than the result. Taking class participation as part of the grades will encourage the students to work harder in the whole semester instead of staying out late during the final exam to make up the missed part. For example, some students will just recite the main points of a course in order to have a better score in the exam just before the test. But they do not spend much time to understand the knowledge and try to use them.

However, the exam is the best and most reliable way to find out whether the students gain the main points of a course are what those who support to grades students merely on exam argue. But what is the goal of education? Apparently, it is not only to increase the knowledge of students, but also to improve their abilities to apply the knowledge. Participation in classes will help the student to think more and understand how to apply the knowledge. With a better understanding of the knowledge, the students will of course improve their expertise in certain area.

According to the reasons above, I support to grade students on both the exam and classes participation. Only when students not only remember the knowledge, but also understand and know how to apply them, will they have a brilliant career after their graduation. Participation in classes, therefore, should be taken into account.

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I strongly recommend you re-read your article before posting it on the site next time.

In the fourth paragraph you states,
"However, the exam is the best and the most reliable way to find out whether the students gain the main points of a course are what those who support to grades students merely on exam argue."

A really crazy sentence that would kill people who read it!
First you are supposed to say, " the exam is the best and the most reliable way to find out whether the students gain the main points of a course", and, this statement, "is what those who are in favor of evaluating students with exams as the sole measure will argue."

So you intertwined the two-fold meaning into one sentence at price of having poorly organized them.
A proper sentence may go like this,
"However, for those people who favor exams as the sole measure to evaluate students' performance, they will generally argue that an exam can be the most reliable way to check out if the students master all main points in a course."

I inversed the sequence of two sentences because the original one would put a heavy weight in its subject (Subject in SOV)- an intact and long sentence indeed, which could make readers confused and be the reason why you failed to write it correctly. You must have forgotten the previous structure when writting this sentence so you added another sentence behind it unwarily.

一点建议:loveliness: ：
Agree with LS~~~~孩子“However“句必改···
2nd段therefore不要用太多第一个是可以去掉的，否则它&Unfair两个词在几个comma间也显D~~~Comma不要乱点EG：So grading students only based on the exam, will discourage people to attend class

Secondly段的EG不够具体或者说有些不够清晰，还要改进一下...下面的"However"用D不好（最简单的方法，可以在前加On the other hand/side）
LZ要注意衔接（包括Comma问题），还有Example的问题（要使文章显得更清晰明朗化~），有些句子不必要刻意去复杂化哦~~反而有些不好D

其实我觉得其它有些句子和前面的结构都还不错D，恩恩~~~稍微改进这篇就会更更好：）
加油加油！！！~~

我觉得第一个例子不好，不去上课并不能说明什么。

建议大家先去看看版规

''it is fair for the student''应该是fair  to 吧，个人觉得第一条理由中fair一词出现了好几次，可以换impartial,equitable,等
''the exam is the best and most reliable way to find out whether the students gain the main points of a course are what those who support to grades students merely on exam argue''语法错误了吧
还有，我觉得你的论述不是太有说服力吧，我觉得不是论据不好，论据可以自圆其说，但是一定要做有说服力的展开

suggestions

hi!
Some sentences are a little of chinese feelings."giving score" can be just "scoring".
First and foremost, it is fair for the student.  What does "it " refer to? The first sentense of a passage is essecial, which must be ensured to have no drawbacks at least!