查看完整版本: 我的一篇作文，希望多加批评

我的一篇作文，希望多加批评

People attend college or university for many reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people should attend college?? Use specific example to support your idea.

“Knowledge is power.” Bacon ，a Philosopher once said. In my point of view, people attend college for increased knowledge. I want to state my opinion in three aspects.

To begin with, “Knowledge is our spiritual supply.” Compared with the vast and endless nature, people’s knowledge is always not enough. This fact caused people continue to obtain more knowledge and make themselves more developed. If people attend college and absorb more knowledge, they will solve many puzzles in their lives and explain many so-called “mysterious” things; if people attend college, they will understand a number of new theories and get closer to our world; if people attend college, they will receive happiness and satisfy their curiosity. As the knowledge makes people wiser and more meaningful, more and more students choose to attend college.

What's more, “Knowledge changes life.” If people attend college, the knowledge they are taught in the college will help them improve their own lives and lead a better future. For instance, students who study chemistry are able to identity noxious food and prevent themselves away while cooking; students who study physics are able to use mechanic skills while fixing their car. Almost everybody is eager to a comfortable lifestyle, so they attend college in order to get increased knowledge and modify their quality of life.

Third, as an ancient Chinese philosopher said:“My brain will be empty without receiving knowledge.” In the view of Chinese philosophy, human beings need knowledge to occupy their so-called “spirit”. It is the fact that people with abundant knowledge find their values more meaningfully than ones without it. Although human life is limited, everyone can create unlimited value in his/her life. According to a survey, most people think the value mainly depends on obtaining more knowledge. They also agree that college is a key to the door of world knowledge and human value.

Someone may say:“The purpose of going to college is only to find a good job.” I can accept this opinion. However, without essential knowledge in college lectures, a well-paid job is nearly impossible. In conclusion, people attend college mostly for increased knowledge.

我是高中生，笔法幼稚，希望高手不吝批评指教。

[[i] 本帖最后由 无影猫踪Q 于 2008-7-13 18:10 编辑 [/i]]

大概看了看, 感觉你的第三个例子是在谈知识的重要性,但这和上大学有什么关系你几乎没有说. 那么这段就显得可有可无了.

谢谢，我会很快改正。

[size=14pt]“Knowledge is power.” Bacon [/size][font=宋体][size=14pt]，[/size][/font][size=14pt]a Philosopher once said. In my point of view, people attend college for[color=red] increased knowledge ([/color][/size][font=宋体][size=14pt]用[/size][/font][size=14pt]increased[/size][font=宋体][size=14pt]语法上是错的，我写的话会用[/size][/font][size=14pt]acquiring knowledge)[/size][size=14pt]. I want to state my opinion in three aspects.

To begin with, “Knowledge is our spiritual supply.” Compared with [color=red]the vast and endless[/color][/size][font=宋体][size=14pt]（[/size][/font][size=14pt]the endless vast[/size][font=宋体][size=14pt]）[/size][/font][size=14pt] nature, people’s knowledge is always not enough. [/size]


[size=14pt]改了一点点，然后发现你似乎走题了，全是在讲知识的重要性。。。[/size]

恩 我同意楼上的 感觉你似乎都是讲知识是多么的重要 应该去学好知识 但文章的题目是讲 上不上大学的 不上大学也可以获得很多的知识啊 比如自己多看看书等等 你应该是说上大学带来的好处 一个是能获得很多的知识 你可以用3个例子来说明这个观点 然后在举一个论点 比如说 上大学能交到很多的朋友 然后在举三个论据 然后在一个论点带3个论据 这就成了传统的3套3 的写法了