happybob 2008-5-5 22:30
小弟第一次写的一篇文章,希望牛人帮忙修改一下!!谢谢哦
[font=Times New Roman] 题目: [font=宋体][size=10pt][size=5][b]It has recently been announced that a new factory may be built in your community. Do you support or oppose this plan? Why? Use specific reasons and details in your answer[/b].[/size][/size][/font][/font]
[font=Times New Roman]With the development of society ,an expanding number of factories spring up.Some people opposed to establish a factory near the community ,while,contrary to the opinion of many people is my heartfelt favor of the idea that setting up a factory near the community will improve the community people’s living level and increase the number and quilty of basic faciliyies.There maybe one or two disadvantages to setting a factory near the community;however,there are far more advantages.[/font]
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[font=Times New Roman]First of all,some minor disadvantages to build a factory include the waste produced[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]by the factory and the traffic jam.For instance,during the evening,the factory may make some noise which can affect people’s sleep and study,besides,as a result of the thick smoke smitted by the factory,the community”s air quality will decrease and people’s heath will be threated a little .Another drawback to building a factory near the community involves the unconvencience of
traffic.For example,the products need to be transported out of the factory by many big trucks ,so the community suffers the traffic.[/font]
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[font=Times New Roman]Even though there maybe one or two disadvantages to building a factory near the community ,the advantages far outweigh them.After the construction of the new factory ,it will improve the community people’s living level.For example,the factory can provide many employment opportuniyies to the community.In addition,people can open all kinds of stoers around the factory ,by opening the stores,the community people woll obtain a good profit and also can improve the income.[/font]
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[font=Times New Roman]Another advantage to building a factory near the communityis that the government will build more basic facilities in the community.For example,since the factory pay a lot of tax to the government who will be able to build a larger parking lot in the community.Maybe some broken benches and street lamps will be replaced by new ones.But most important thing is that a larger garden will be taken into consideration after the increasing tax paid by the new factory in the community.[/font]
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[size=10.5pt]Although I agree that there maybe a couple of disadvantages to construction a factory near the community,I feel that the advantages are more obvious,the new factory’s coming can improve the community people’s living level in many kinds of ways.Moreover,the tax paid by the factory will help the community set up more basic facilities easily.In my opinion,these are two most important goals for the community to consider,and building a factory is the best way to achieve them.[/size]
[[i] 本帖最后由 happybob 于 2008-5-6 07:20 编辑 [/i]]
chershang002 2008-5-6 11:51
总体结构上没有问题,有几处拼写错误和语法错误,LZ很不错啦!
happybob 2008-5-6 12:55
回复 2# 的帖子
谢谢哦,能帮忙指证一下吗?我自己找到一处是There “maybe” one or two disadvantages to setting a factory near the community;however,there are far more advantages.
maybe 应该写成“may be "